You learn something new everyday~

I have come to the realization that in life and in this world, we have to keep moving forward. We cant learn something and hold onto it, share it with no one and expect to keep progressing through life. If we do this, we are stuck, we are going nowhere, helping no one and delaying our purpose in life.

For a long time now I have been wanting to witness, to share God with others, but I always had something holding me back. I felt like I didn't know enough to start sharing it with others, what if someone asked me a question I didn't know the answer too? So I kept reading, kept studying and kept trying to learn as much as I could. And then it hit me, I am learning things I have known since I was 8 years old, I am reading the same passages, the same messages over and over again. (There is nothing wrong with that at all!) But I realized that I do know what to say, what to do, and yes, maybe someday someone will ask me a question that I don't have an answer too, but that will only give me reason to study more and learn things I never knew. I was up late last night thinking these things, and woke up this morning to find the book mark in my bible at Hebrews 6:1-3

"Therefore, leaving the discussion of the elementary principles of Christ, let us go on to perfection, not laying again the foundation of repentance from dead works and of faith toward God, of the doctrine of baptisms, of laying on of hands of resurrection of the dead, and of eternal judgement. And this we will do if God permits."

WOW! I read alot more than that, but this really hit me. I already know the "elementary" principles of Christ and I need to be sharing them. How am I supposed to move on to Middle School, High School, College, If I am stuck learning again and again only the things I have learned in Elementary School. And these thoughts lead to other thoughts, and other thoughts led to more thoughts and I just kept thinking and thinking and thinking! And I'm still thinking :) I'm thinking that although I still don't know what exactly I want to do with my life, I know that I want to help other people. I want share with them and be there for them. I don't know if that means being a teacher, and nurse, and counselor or what. But I don't need to know that right now, Im only now in middle school ;)

Change

I cant tell you how many times I write blogs, long, in-depth, meaningful blogs and then erase them before I hit 'post'. Then I eventually go back and write something short and boring about moving, packing or a new house. I don't know why I cant bring myself to open up and share what it is that I really want to share. I feel like people know me as a young, care free sort of girl, and if I share my feelings people will think that I'm faking or trying to sound mature. But the truth of the matter is, I am mature! I have grown up so much in the last 2 years and I honestly do feel like a completely different person. I look at things differently, handle things differently, I want and strive for completely different things in my life. Everything I had 'planned' for myself has gone out the window with my new life (marriage) and I have a totally new and much better set of dreams and goals.

I'm scared to say things, to do things, because I am worried about what people will think or say about me. I don't want to be viewed differently, I just want people to realize that marriage really does change a person in such a dramatic way. Its a good thing, a very good thing. I am much less selfish, I cant just think of what I want to do, or where I want to be in my life. I have to think about US and what would be best for US. And most importantly, what God wants for US. God comes first, then my husband, and then myself. Rather than
myself, myself, myself and my friends like it used to be.

People are always telling me that I'm young and I need to enjoy myself well I still can. Well, I am enjoying myself, everyday. That doesn't mean I cant be mature about it. I don't have to go out every night,  and party on the weekends to enjoy myself. I love my life everyday and I wouldn't change it for anything. My 21st birthday is in a couple of weeks, and guess what I want to do.....NOTHING. I honestly have no desire to do anything....I would be totally happy just staying in and spending time with my husband. Although, if anyone knows Jesse at all, you know that wont happen :) He is too sweet to not let me do anything on my birthday.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I am different now, and I don't want to be viewed as some little girl playing house wife. I'm not looking for attention or sympathy or anything at all!! I just want people to know that some thing have changed: I don't want to be a wedding planner anymore, I don't wear 3lbs of make-up everywhere I go, I don't want to be the center of attention, I don't walk around singing at the top of lungs, and I'm not...believe it or not...I am not nearly as prissy or afraid of bugs, snakes, creepers as I used to be. I can handle things on my own, I know how to cook, how to clean and how to be a respectable young lady. So please, remember that I am not 16 anymore and people do grow up and they do change..... for the better :)

Our new home

We made it! We are almost all unpacked and settled in to our new home :) And we love it!! It is just a rental house, but we are trying to give it a couple updates and finishing touches to make it as comfortable and as "us" as we possibly can. Oh and we got a home phone, which I am pretty excited about, so if you want our number let me know!

We are living in a HUGE gated community called "The Landings" (google it) and it is beyond amazing. It is so full of scenery and wildlife, it has pools, tennis courts, 8 golf courses, 2 marinas and 24/7 security. It is what some might call a "retirement community" :) But we are in love with it! When we first found the house online, we had no idea where/what kind of neighborhood it was in, but now that we are here, we could not be any happier. Friday night we got invited to a party on the watch tower looking over the beautiful marsh. It was so much fun and we got to meet all of our neighbors, yes everyone is over the age of 50...but they are so much fun and so soo sweet.

Jesse doesn't have to start work for another week, so we have lots of time to set up the house and try to start getting to know the area. I wanted to start school this month, but the college only has a few classes available and none that I really need, so Iv decided to wait until January so I can take classes I actually need. In the mean time, Ill be looking for a job and possibly volunteering at one of the aquariums.

We are so blessed to be able to live here, everyone is so nice and the area is absolutely beautiful. Pictures will be coming soon :)